Within a few short weeks, this semester became different from anything I could have imagined. I thought that my first semester had taught me more about myself than ever before, but within the past few months I have learned an even greater amount. After finally building a sense of comfort and kind of figuring out the whole college thing, having it stripped away so quickly was more disorienting and painful than I could have ever prepared for. 

At the beginning of the semester, I learned confidence in my independence and was figuring out how to truly thrive. The balance between my heavy course load, club involvement, and social life was finally coming together to a point where I felt like UD was now my home. If there had been any uncertainty before, that was wiped away and I learned that I could do this. It felt like I was cruising down an open stretch of highway with endless possibilities ahead, but on March 11th, I hit the biggest and most unexpected speed bump.

The goodbyes I had to make in the following days were the hardest ones I’ve ever given. Usually, even if it will be a while,there is a sense of certainty that I will see someone again. However, in those moments every goodbye was completely open-ended, because we all knew the future ahead was covered in a thick layer of fog and uncertainty. As I packed up my room on a deserted campus, I learned that sometimes you don’t know you are living some of the best days of your life until they are suddenly over.

In the past months with nothing but endless time and thoughts, I have learned about the ways in which I cope and how to cherish even the most simple things. I’ve always thought of myself as a present-minded person, reminding myself to remember the special moments where I feel truly happy. But now that the entire idea of “normal” has been turned on its head, I find myself missing the smallest things that I took for granted like eating dinner with friends or walking to class on a sunny day. In a time where I am unable to give a big hug or reassuring smile, I’ve learned to remind those I love that I care about them in different ways to make up for the large distances between us. I’ve learned that a Zoom call will never be the same as sitting in the same room, but for now even seeing a friendly face is enough. 

My second semester of college was more chaotic and trying than I could’ve ever imagined, but I have learned to embrace even more gratitude and love for the things I have and to cherish every moment to come even more.

Cally Carmello